10 things that have powered me through the pandemic
Looking at Timehop over the past week or so has been weird. I cringe seeing each tweet, photo, and naiive joke about hand washing and quarantining. Through social media, I’ve watched my past self careen toward the end of life as I knew it, wanting to scream through the screen: “STOP, it’s going to be so much worse than you think!” I came across — and winced — at the cute little post I wrote on March 13, our last normal day, about “podcasts to ride out the pandemic.” As if this sordid slice of history would pass like some kind of extended snow day. If only.
Over the past 12 months of this holding pattern, I’ve needed much more than a handful of podcasts to keep moving (although, as I wrote a few months ago, Men in Blazers did yeoman’s work in this respect). When I look back on this lost year, I’ll of course remember the headlines — but I hope I’ll also recall the mishmash of simple, sometimes unexpected things that have held me together. My top 10, in no particular order, are:
Jeopardy
We were always occasional Jeopardy watchers in this house, but when the pandemic set in, it became essential. Every day at 7 p.m., the TV went on, and for a half hour, Dan and I would be in the same place, at the same time, doing the same thing — which was a feat, when we were both working full-time jobs AND running a full-time daycare. Alex Trebek was someone and Jeopardy was something that could keep us connected to “normality” amidst so much anxiety and fear. But it was also a ritual of connection in a swirl of never-ending busy-ness and stress, something that brought us together when so much was pulling us apart. Even though since January we haven’t had Alex’s comforting voice to rely on every night, Jeopardy remains a non-negotiable part of our daily schedule.
A pumice stone
I am a runner (well, I attempt to be), so my feet are *gross*: a mishmash of calluses and cracked heels and the occasional missing toenail. When I worked out of the house and wore shoes all the time, they were out of sight, out of mind. But when I’m home, I don’t wear shoes, and I hate wearing just socks. My icky feet became a problem. I wasn’t (and I’m still not) comfortable going to a nail salon, so I decided to try to bring the salon home in the form of a pumice stone. I started using it 1-2 times per week and let me tell you … my feet have never been in better shape. I may never get a pedicure again (OK that’s a lie, but you know what I mean).
Fitness Blender
When we adopted Leilani, I had to stop going to the gym before work (she would bark her head off anytime I left, and I don’t think our neighbors would have been cool with a howling 4:30 a.m. wake-up call). A friend of mine recommended Fitness Blender for at-home workouts. I used it sparingly at the time, but four years later, it’s become a lifeline. There are hundreds of free videos ranging in length, difficulty, training type, equipment, and body focus. Need a 20 minute stretch between Zoom meetings? They’ve got a video for that. Want to kick your own ass for an hour? They’ve got a video for that, too. What the videos lack in production value they make up for in content and coaching. Thanks to Kelli and Daniel, I can do squats correctly for the first time in my life.
My maternity sweats and leggings
In the early weeks of the pandemic, we were going through about three bottles of wine per week as a way of coping with the stress and anxiety. (Related: There were also a lot of chocolate chip cookies.) No amount of Fitness Blender workouts were going to make a dent in the consequences of that indulgence and even my stretchiest leggings were getting snug. But I had an ace up my sleeve: maternity pants. Specifically, three pairs of leggings and one pair of sweats I splurged on from Motherhood Maternity in the last weeks of my pregnancy the previous year. Who knew that (a) maternity clothes make an excellent pandemic wardrobe and (b) we’d actually have a pandemic so I could discover that fact?
Emily Oster’s ParentData newsletter
I began following Emily Oster a few years ago when my brilliant friend Candace recommended her book, Expecting Better, which explores whether scientific research actually backs up the advice doctors and elders give pregnant women. Early last year, Oster, an economist, took the same view toward COVID developments, providing commentary and updates via her weekly newsletter. Her work was so helpful in understand the context behind what I was reading and hearing in the news and how to assess and reassess my family’s risk based on constantly emerging research. Sometimes I like what she had to say and other times she scares the shit out of me — but I still read that newsletter every time it hits my inbox.
Takeout and delivery booze
We’ve not taken advantage of this silver lining of pandemic life nearly enough, but the few times we have, it’s been *awesome.* Getting a bucket of to-go margaritas from Zen West and having a case of wine dropped off our doorstep from Kenilworth Wine and Spirits felt sinfully good. I hope against hope this continues to be a thing after the pandemic. The parents of America need this, desperately.
Giving
My family has been fortunate throughout this terrible year. We’ve stayed healthy, employed, and comfortable, but we know we’re an outlier in this case. While we don’t have a ton to give, we’ve volunteered or made donations to organizations working to help those struggling in the face of 2020-21’s disasters. It always feels good to do something — even if it’s small — to help someone else when it feels like everything is out of control.
Our dishwasher
We replaced our dishwasher in December 2019 and it’s one of the most important things we could have done (albeit unwittingly) to prepare for life in a pandemic. Whether we’re cooking or having takeout, we’ve eaten just about every meal for the past year in this house. That dishwasher runs at least every other day and NEVER lets us down. It is unquestionably the MVP of this entire ordeal.
Long walks with Leilani
In addition to losing our daycare, we lost our dog walker for about two months because of Maryland’s shelter-in-place order. That meant I took on Leilani’s midday walks on top of our usual morning walks. Although they posed scheduling challenges as we balanced work and childcare, these walks quickly became less chore and more treat (at least on the days it didn’t rain). Even now, with our dog walker back in business, walking Leilani has forced me to get up out of my desk chair and breathe some fresh air. On many days, these walks are my only workout (as I mentioned earlier, I had a *lot* of wine to account for in those early days). I’m thankful I have a big, beautiful, and safe neighborhood in which to walk and a trusty hound who forces me to take advantage of that.
Daily FaceTime calls with Mom (and sometimes Dad)
At the beginning of all this, I was concerned about whether my parents would take COVID seriously. My dad seemed hellbent on continuing to work outside the house (even though he doesn’t have to!) and they were still seeing some of their friends from their trivia group and other social circles. So I made them an offer: Stay home as much as you can, wear your masks, and I’ll FaceTime you every day so you can hang out with your grandson. They accepted. I’ve probably talked to my parents (ok, my mom) more in the past year than I have in the past decade. I don’t know who’s enjoyed that more, mom or kiddo. And I’ve been pretty happy about it, too.
Today marks the one-year anniversary of when the world shutdown kicked into overdrive. It’s hard to wrap my head around just how much has changed in 12 months, how many things I thought were bedrock certainties just aren’t, how many people aren’t here with us today who should be, and how much we’ve all lost. But I’m grateful we’re closer to the end of this ordeal than we were at this time last year, and I’m grateful for this olio of lifelines that’s helped me get this far.